In a
time when it seems like politicians may all be clones, they definitely broke the
bottle when they decanted Barnaby Joyce.

We know
he’s anti-abortion, but he was out and about again
last week talking about “women’s issues,” claiming that a cervical cancer vaccine could be taken as
a licence for teenage promiscuity. Because clearly the first and
foremost thing on a young girl’s mind when she decides whether to get it on or not is that she might develop
cervical cancer in later life,
rather than, say, the fear of getting pregnant, or catching an STI, or the double-standard that might see
her labelled a slut while their
boyfriend gets called a stud.

Nope, it’s definitely the cervical cancer thing. Better not
immunise them,
then.

And
yet, just when you think you’ve got him all figured out as an
arch-conservative/villain, he suddenly decides to visit a bunch of asylum
seekers on Christmas Island and talk about how lovely they are, and how
humbling their faith in Australia is, and how he thinks they are genuine
refugees.

Human
rights are obviously important to our Barnyard – as long as they don’t involve
women’s reproductive rights.