The bout between Paul Gallen (right) and Kris Terzievski proved more popular than the debate with Queanbeyan Hotel patrons (Image: AAP/Darren Pateman)

The pub is streaming the big fight — Paul Gallen v Kris Terzievski. Locals cheer and clap as two muscular men beat the bejesus out of each other.

I sit in a dark corner and watch two far less physically substantial men try to land blows — and fail.

Billed as the final showdown, last night’s Seven Network-hosted debate between Scott Morrison and Anthony Albanese didn’t engage the locals at the Hotel Queanbeyan, less than 10km from Canberra in the bellwether seat of Eden-Monaro.

If the pub test actually exists, the debate failed it.

Praise is due to 7News political editor Mark Riley. He did a much better job than previous hosts at letting the pair say their piece, keeping them on track, and reining them in when they set off on tangents. But it’s hard to sell when no one seems to be buying.

Before the debate starts, there are the final dregs of Big Brother — a show that was cancelled in 2008 after an incident two years before when a cast member was sexually assaulted on camera.  It’s fitting, then, that much of the debate focuses on what each party did in response to allegations of bullying and harassment.

Well, it would be nice if Riley had phrased it like that. Instead he didn’t refer to Miller by name; instead he called her Tudge’s “former lover”, something Miller has asked the media stop doing.

Miller also has not yet been paid any compensation.

Morrison talked up the independent inquiry he’d quickly established — “I didn’t wait for anybody to write to me or do anything like that” — while skimming over the fact his cabinet had worked very hard to sweep previous allegations of rape by Brittany Higgins under the rug.

The inquiry didn’t make a finding against Tudge, and he’s set to be reinstated as education minister if the government is reelected. Also left unsaid was that Miller declined to participate in the inquiry because her concerns about the terms of reference were ignored.

The debate moved to predictable waters — childcare to wage increases, the threat of independents, climate change and the cost of living. 

There was limited aggression — perhaps matching the apathy of pub viewers — and it ended with Riley asking Morrison and Albanese to list a strength they admired in one another. Morrison answered with what Riley called a “compliment sandwich”: he complimented Albanese’s determination and then criticised his attention to detail. (To be fair, Riley did ask what Morrison liked in “this gentleman that you admire [who] also worries you”.) Albanese complimented Morrison’s mental health policies. 

The pair then gave their closing remarks — once more a predictable, lacklustre spiel of their talking points.

It finished at the same time as the title fight, won by Terzievski. The pub erupted in cheers — but not for either leader.