The results are in from the Readers’ Choice section of Crikey’s film awards, The Golden Choc-Tops. Thank you to all who filled out the survey — and told us about the delights of “squid floss” at the movies and which Australian politician you’d most like to see as a Na’vi.

The Julie & Julia Award for best cinema snack

Nominees:

  • Popcorn
  • Choc-Top
  • Fantales
  • Maltesters
  • Jaffas
  • Lolly bags
  • Clams
  • Wine

And the winner is…  the humble Choc-Top with a third of the vote. Runner-up: wine.

Other cinema snacks that rated a mention were “sushi and beer [summer] or red [winter]” as well as the intriguing “squid-floss”. Some of our readers were very specific with their favoured movie food, from “gelato choc-tops at Palace Cinema Leichhardt” to “Beer — Dendy in Canberra serves James Squire, which accompanies a fillum wonderfully”.

Most irritating part of the cinema-going experience

Nominees:

  • Mobile phones
  • People talking
  • Noisy eaters
  • Uncomfortable seats
  • Expensive popcorn
  • Too many ads
  • Halitosis

And the winner is… People talking, with a whopping 44% of the vote.

Other notable mentions from Crikey readers were teenagers, Ben Stiller and “Somebody sitting directly in front of you when there are dozens of other seats they could choose”. And who let First Dog do the survey? “Lack of Unicorns. Where is my Christopher Pyne blockbuster?”

The Jar Jar Binks award for most irritating alien race of 2009

Nominees:

  • The Na’vi (Avatar)
  • The prawns (District 9)
  • The Transformers (Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen)
  • Those diminutive green twits you’ve probably never heard of because the movie wasn’t very successful (Aliens in the Attic)

And the winner is… Transformers with 44% of the vote. Yes, there is an alien race more annoying than the Na’vi.

Other notable mentions were invading meatballs, the boy band vampires in Tweelight and, apparently, The Dutch

Australian politician most likely to star as a Na’vi in Avatar 2

  • Julia Gillard
  • Peter Garrett
  • Tony Abbott
  • Bob Brown
  • Christopher Pyne

And the winner is… Peter Garrett with 37% of the vote. When asked to explain why they chose Garrett, one Crikey reader’s response said it all: “Who else? Preternaturally big, kinda confused looking, nominally green (but actually a weird pink during Opposition censure motions)”.

The next closest contender was Christopher Pyne (24%).

Most overrated Oscar-nominated film of the past decade

  • Chocolat
  • Moulin Rouge
  • Chicago
  • Seabiscuit
  • Gladiator (Russell Crowe #1)
  • A Beautiful Mind (Russell Crowe #2)
  • The Aviator
  • Crash
  • Slumdog Millionaire
  • Avatar
  • Titanic (No, what? That was more than ten years ago? I’m so old.)

And the winner is… Moulin Rouge, nudging out Avatar (“It’s just Pocahontas with aliens!) for most overrated film of the past 10 years.

Though some were all for Chocolat getting the gong — “Depp + Binoche = molasses” — and one person was very disappointed at the lack of cookie in Seabiscuit: “It’s about a horse. No sea-faring tales or anything about biscuits… just a dumb horse with a stupid name (banal film, too)”.

The film that should REALLY win the best film award at the 2010 Oscars but won’t because Avatar will

  • The Blind Side
  • District 9
  • An Education
  • The Hurt Locker
  • Inglourious Basterds
  • Precious
  • A Serious Man
  • Up
  • Up in the Air
  • Avatar (c,mon there hasn’t been a film this good about blue people since The Smurfs and the Magic Flute)

And the winner is… The Hurt Locker on 23% with District 9 and Inglourious Basterds runners-up.

Why Hurt Locker? Said one reader: “Kathryn Bigelow is a brilliant female director who isn’t doing arthouse films or terrible Nancy Meyers/Nora Ephron romcoms. And she can direct kickass & beautiful action scenes. Would be fab to see her finally recognised for good work rather than seeing her ex-husband be applauded for technological prowess but narrative cliche.” Sold.

Up was the money for one reader however: “Expositional montage of old guy’s life before adventure made me cry like a girl. Old wife collapses walking up hill they ran up as young lovers? Are you made of stone?”

Best Aussie film of the past year

  • Balibo
  • Samson & Delilah
  • Mary and Max
  • Blessed
  • Cedar Boys
  • Dying Breed
  • Disgrace
  • Lucky Country

And the winner is… Samson & Delilah, which ran away with 50% of the vote, though many readers said they hadn’t seen an Aussie film in the past year. “It shifted accepted attitudes to causes, crime and responsibility”, wrote person who had. Balibo was runner-up.

Beautiful Kate scored a few mentions, while one reader was more interested in the real-life drama, Crocodile Dundee vs ATO.